Seems like all anyone is talking about recently is race. Zimmerman, Deen, and now Riley Cooper (he of the Philadelphia Eagles) have kept the conversation going. I've written enough about race for a lifetime. I'm just as tired of it as you are. Here's the vid...
But...I had a conversation with a co-worker yesterday that helped me articulate my feelings a little better. See, my co-worker also happens to be a very funny (but clean) comedian. He strays away from "controversial" topics and does material that, for the most part, would be considered family-friendly. That's also his personality, so it makes sense (follow him or whatever @erikedmunds on twitter). Anyway, as you may know...I'm NOT a clean comedian. I say things that some may find offensive. I've never told a joke with the intention of offending (in fact, I rarely if ever say "nigger/nigga" on stage). But my personality causes me to address topics that people are passionate about. Those topics are often polarizing (not to mention i got this AMAZING bit about vibrators). Oh...and I cuss (Erik says I use "swear words"...because he's a 70 year old in a 31 year olds body).
Anyway, comedians use language to get their audience to respond (hopefully by laughing or applauding...hopefully). I don't expect the things I say on stage to necessarily be acceptable in public (i still say the shit...but whatever). There's a reason it's called "an act". So...let's discuss group dynamics and social contracts. I don't call women bitch or cunt because I understand that those words are offensive to women. I don't really need to know "why". Specifically because i'm NOT a woman and I grasp group dynamics, I don't care if women call each other 50 leven (if u don't get that...it's ok) bitches...I know I shouldn't. Same with "faggot". I grew up during a time where people said that word freely. Louis CK opens one of his sets with a joke about how it was used when he was growing up. As time changed, the contract changed. People realized (for the most part) that it was offensive to the LGBT (of course some aren't offended...in general though) community and stopped using it. I don't care if I was at a Pride parade and saw a bazillion people saying it...I wouldn't join in. Group Dynamics. I'm not a part of the group...I don't get to make the rules (Paula Deen...I grew up hearing that word and figured out NOT to use it...see?). Heterosexual privilege doesn't compel me to say "but you say it..." because I don't feel entitled to group membership.
That's the issue for me. The "it's hypocrisy because you guys say it" argument is boiling down complex dynamics into "if you want equality, then everyone can do the same things". If you believe that...cool. It's bullshit. But cool. Because you also have to live with yourself. Do you want to say nigger/cunt/bitch/faggot for equality? Because I've never seen anyone using those words in that context attacked. Louis CK didn't get charges of racism/homophobia for his stand up where he used both the f/n words within 10 minutes of each other. Why? Because...context. Context. But...nuanced thinking isn't for everyone. Neither is honesty. If you're intellectually honest, you know that there are things your wife can say to you that aren't acceptable if someone else says it. You get it. You just don't want to. Stop It B
But...I had a conversation with a co-worker yesterday that helped me articulate my feelings a little better. See, my co-worker also happens to be a very funny (but clean) comedian. He strays away from "controversial" topics and does material that, for the most part, would be considered family-friendly. That's also his personality, so it makes sense (follow him or whatever @erikedmunds on twitter). Anyway, as you may know...I'm NOT a clean comedian. I say things that some may find offensive. I've never told a joke with the intention of offending (in fact, I rarely if ever say "nigger/nigga" on stage). But my personality causes me to address topics that people are passionate about. Those topics are often polarizing (not to mention i got this AMAZING bit about vibrators). Oh...and I cuss (Erik says I use "swear words"...because he's a 70 year old in a 31 year olds body).
Erik Says "Don't Swear"...asshole |
Anyway, comedians use language to get their audience to respond (hopefully by laughing or applauding...hopefully). I don't expect the things I say on stage to necessarily be acceptable in public (i still say the shit...but whatever). There's a reason it's called "an act". So...let's discuss group dynamics and social contracts. I don't call women bitch or cunt because I understand that those words are offensive to women. I don't really need to know "why". Specifically because i'm NOT a woman and I grasp group dynamics, I don't care if women call each other 50 leven (if u don't get that...it's ok) bitches...I know I shouldn't. Same with "faggot". I grew up during a time where people said that word freely. Louis CK opens one of his sets with a joke about how it was used when he was growing up. As time changed, the contract changed. People realized (for the most part) that it was offensive to the LGBT (of course some aren't offended...in general though) community and stopped using it. I don't care if I was at a Pride parade and saw a bazillion people saying it...I wouldn't join in. Group Dynamics. I'm not a part of the group...I don't get to make the rules (Paula Deen...I grew up hearing that word and figured out NOT to use it...see?). Heterosexual privilege doesn't compel me to say "but you say it..." because I don't feel entitled to group membership.
That's the issue for me. The "it's hypocrisy because you guys say it" argument is boiling down complex dynamics into "if you want equality, then everyone can do the same things". If you believe that...cool. It's bullshit. But cool. Because you also have to live with yourself. Do you want to say nigger/cunt/bitch/faggot for equality? Because I've never seen anyone using those words in that context attacked. Louis CK didn't get charges of racism/homophobia for his stand up where he used both the f/n words within 10 minutes of each other. Why? Because...context. Context. But...nuanced thinking isn't for everyone. Neither is honesty. If you're intellectually honest, you know that there are things your wife can say to you that aren't acceptable if someone else says it. You get it. You just don't want to. Stop It B
I elect felonious munk and President of the US, in 2016.
ReplyDeleteCan't be as bad as the JOKE in there now.
Fine. If Riley can't use the word nigger, then I would expect the black community to also be outraged any time one of their people says "cracka", "cracker", "whitey", or any of the other racially derogatory remarks. Their lack of outrage IS hypocritical.
ReplyDeleteHorribly weak argument for one reason. Hypocrisy means same behavior. No one expects white people to be outraged at Riley Cooper. Thus, your claim doesn't add up.
DeleteFurther example of reaching. If you want to say nigger, or think it's ok, then say it. You don't need to make any attempt to justify your behavior by saying "so and so does it too". That's what children do. Also, I CLEARLY gave other examples of inappropriate speech and pointed out that ALL of it was wrong. No one is defending the use of cracka, cracker, or whitey. And no one has asked anyone to be outraged. You're coloring outside of the lines.
DeleteNo, you're twisting it, perhaps without realizing it. It's not about being able to say nigger without consequence, it's about a group of people making a very big deal about other people making racist remarks while they're making racist remarks themselves. Yes, that's hypocritical behavior, otherwise known as "Do as I say, not as I do".
DeleteI do not need to use the word nigger to get a point across. My vocabulary is no where near that limited, and I can easily offend and piss someone off just as much without having once said nigger.
That's the core of it - the people like myself, that are disgusted with all this, aren't fighting for the right to say nigger, but rather to eliminate the double standard in this country, where certain things said are OK only when used by certain groups of people.
I'd say your husband/wife example is also a stretch. That's not a group. It's not like I can say something to my wife, and also to every other wife out there and have it be OK.
Further, I think the impact of the word has been so devalued by the EXTENSIVE use of it, especially in the black hip hop music world, that it really doesn't matter any more (We'll just ignore the fact that more white people are consuming that world far more than blacks are, and the black people _making_ the music are wel aware of this...).
ReplyDeleteIt's now right up there with calling a women a bitch or a cunt - it's gotten so overused in popular culture that it's just another word now. With the exception that a "white" person saying it can suddenly garner a whole hell of a lot of media ratings.
At the end of the day, I'm certainly not looking up to the black people around me calling each other niggers. _Aanyone_ using the word, white, black, or otherwise, just looks like ignorant trash to me, just as anyone using words like bitch, cunt, fuck, or any of the many derivatives.
I'm twisting nothing. I didn't call anyone racist. nor did i call anyone a hypocrite. nor did i speak about a group of people. i spoke SPECIFICALLY about the individuals who defended using the word because "rappers do" or "i grew up during a different time". no where did i defend any group using a racial slur towards anyone. So your comment seems to come from a place not in anyway related to my blog. which leads to the question...what was your intent? was it to raise awareness of the widespread hypocrisy of humans in general (and black people specifically) or did you just want to point out a flaw in black reasoning? I've said here and a million other places that people are hypocrites. I've pointed out that black homophobia is an ignorant behavior specifically coming from a group of people sensitive to oppression. So your comment isn't to me. It isn't related to the blog. It's just you raging against the machine in a place where it's unnecessary. consider, nobody was OUTRAGED about Riley's use. I've checked every social site available. every newspaper at my disposal...where is this outrage? and if you're taking the few bloggers who may have written a piece about it as "outrage"...you're reaching. How you judge someone who uses words is...your business. But...cut it out with the hyperbolic "black people are outraged whenever someone says..." no. we're not. we weren't outraged when Paula Deen said it either. You might want to look up the definition of "outrage". Making jokes for days isn't what a group of "outraged" people do. The majority of black people aren't outraged over any words. That's why i said you're reaching.
Delete